Dirty laundry

I've got some dirty laundry I'd like to air out because frankly, I'm tired of holding it in.

Elisabeth has been having a lot of potty accidents during the day. A lot.  She's actually been having them on and off since we started at KinderCare, right before Sydney was born.  That's when I started feeling like my little girl was very fragile and I was afraid I would break her.  We have tried just about every potty training and parenting technique to try and alleviate the accidents, all of which have not helped.  We recently took her to get an abdominal ultrasound and x-ray to see if there was something physically wrong. Everything looks normal.  We are now seeing a child psychologist to see if she can help us figure out how to emotionally fix it.  We have one session under our belt, four more to go.  Please pray that this works. Because I can't bear to hear the school nurse tell me again that she doesn't consider Elisabeth to be potty trained.  If I have to hear it again I may climb thru the phone and smack that woman who is actually very nice, so it would't be so nice for me to do that.

I am embarrassed about Elisabeth's accidents and often worry that people will think we are bad parents.  Yes, I know that's crazy.

My dad has prostate cancer.  He is having his prostate removed in a few weeks.  I'm pretty confident that my dad is going to be just fine, but that C word is scary as hell and really bothers me. A lot.

I have a lump in my neck, just below my ear.  I don't really think it's anything to worry about, but I'm having a cat-scan to check it out and figure out if it's a cyst or an enlarged lymph node which would need to be biopsied.  I'm a little neurotic these days, so it's a little bothersome to me.

Mark's dad has been in the hospital twice in the past few weeks and he is fine, but it has not been a fun rollercoaster.

My grandpa Marvin died in January. I miss him dearly and can't get myself to post anything about his death and his amazing funeral.

I am totally stressed out and working really hard trying to relearn everything at my job.  I am in love with my job, I'm just working some long hours and it's hard for me to balance my career and my family at the moment.

I had a dream the other night that Elisabeth had cancer, so I told Mark about it last night.  He confessed to me that he had the same dream recently but didn't want to tell me because he knew I would freak out.

Officially freaked out.  One dream is okay, but two separate parties having the same dream is a bit profound, don't you think?

I feel like I have a lot on my plate.  It's been a long year, and I'm tired.  I think back to after Mark's heart attack and how clear everything was to me, and it makes me chuckle because now that he is fine everything is muddy.

What the heck is that all about?